July 26th 11:03 am
I made it to Elea's house! They picked me up at the station, then we came to the house where she showed me around and introduced everyone. This morning they all left to go work at 6 am, I wish I could work too. I like working. Elea said they will work til noon so I spent most of the morning exploring the fields and taking pictures. I also ate green beans, raspberries, and even a tomato. In a lot of ways it reminds me of home. Dandelions, wild raspberries, and Queen Anne's Lace all remind me of why I love Michigan and miss it. But I think most of all I miss the feeling of being in a family.
5:19 pm
I don't understand myself. It's great here and it's wonderful to see Elea and meet her family but I have a horrible lost feeling I just can't shake. I would guess it has to do with having no school, job, home, friends.... I feel like I've fallen through the looking-glass and am careening down a never-ending hole. I'm a person of goals, plans, and ideas how can I be so lost?
9:30 pm
Where am I going? What am I doing? I hate not knowing the answers to such simple questions. How about "Who am I?" that's another one that I'd like to know. You would think at nearly 24 I would be moving out and in control, especially someone as organized as I am. I hate having to depend on my parents. I know they love me and want to help but it's not fair to them or healthy for me to depend so much on them.
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